Happiness is a state of mind.
There is no singular cause for being happy - happier people are the ones who choose to be so. Happiness is available in abundance and its everywhere around us - in the air, on the mountains, in the middle of the sea, in a jungle, in gushing water, in rain, in sunshine, in music, in dance. It's in us.
For an entrepreneur delight is seeing their company grow, for a working professional delight is seeing his efforts bearing fruit in the form of a job increment/promotion. Delight is hanging out with friends for a teenager and the instant gratification of physiological need for an infant.
Right from birth our hierarchy of needs is established and remains elemental for all of us, but with time we seem to abandon things and move on at such a pace, that there comes a time that we don't realize where we were heading, and what we are reaching for. An infant enjoys being in her mother's arms, and pulling her father's hair. But soon the sound of a rattle, which once was the best stimulus to oblige an infant, holds no meaning for a toddler or young child.
Mistakes happen when with every passing stage of development; we start valuing newly found stimuli more than they warrant. What is important is the realization that no one can be happy alone. Reason for a child's happiness can never be things or toys, they might bring momentary joy but children elicit real joy being with parents and enjoying their attention. Coming into teenage years and early-adulthood, we explore certain new aspects of life. There is energy, vigor and excitement. We are proud of the autonomy that we acquire and are ready to take the world head-on. But no joy can be felt unless it is shared with family and friends. Peer groups mean a lot at this time and we make some of the best memories of our life. Those memories are never about things, but people. No one can party alone.
True happiness is always shared. It lies in giving. When our efforts make the other person smile that's when we shall get a real kick of happiness. If with growing age, we focus on our ability to make others feel comfortable then we shall be able to bring out the best in them and will never age. The essence of happiness lies in forgetting about our own needs and demands. It is focusing on necessities of others.
A good corporate leader is the one who cares about his team and facilitates them to give their peak performance. They are happy to see others achievements as much as their own. A healthy and happy frame of mind spreads bubbles of joy and harmony. Just the way parents nourish and bring up their kids, and feel happy to see them as good human beings.
It's important to understand that things that make us happy are never our own, and the happiness we get can not be snatched by anyone but ourselves. If we are sitting and waiting for events and people to make us happy, then the wait could be really long. It's only killing our precious time. We have to take the initiative for our happiness which we shall find in being with others. The formula that generates happiness is our true feelings towards others. It could be lovers, a spouse, parents and children, siblings, relatives, friends or acquaintances. To experience true delight we have to learn to give wholeheartedly. Nothing in this world comes free so value every person who is giving you a smile and reciprocate wholeheartedly. If you see someone in need, extend your help courteously and wholeheartedly. This is not always someone dressed in rags, it could be an elderly person struggling to find a store or a young lady managing her luggage with children. This person could be sitting right next to you in your office. There is always scope for extending help. These simple acts of kindness bring joy.
Don't waste a minute not being happy. It's the best makeup you can always put on, and it never goes out of style. Carry the happy aura everywhere you go!
Dr. Harshant Upadhyaya is an Eversparks Counselor and Clinical Psychologist operating her private practice in Mumbai, where she works with individuals and couples of different ages. Using a holistic and insightful way of tackling problems, she practices a combination of different therapies and helps patients inculcate positivity and resilience in their daily lives. With 16 years of work experience, her endeavor has been to spread awareness about how to unleash vast human potential. She believes finite efforts can bring in infinite happiness, joy and peace. She has successfully dealt with people of different age groups suffering from stress, anxiety, depression, confidence issues and more. She is friendly, empathetic and an extrovert who believes in living life to the fullest.
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